LOVE

What was all this future going to do with me.

I am bad choices, I am brave

Soaring and crashing all at once

I am angry tears, I am reluctant smiles

Loathing and loving all at once

I am clumsy, I am rare

And behold, you were all those things all at once.

Blind for love,

I walked the fine line between insanity and depravity

Doomed either way, I saved the date

Etched it onto my skin-

Bumps and ridges a pulsing reminder.

Forgive me father for I have sinned,

Lured by a psychedelic mirage

My walk of purpose now lacks faith

First, I will tell this world the truth

Next, I will burn my bridge to you

I will save that date again

Etch it onto my skin-

Bumps and ridges a pulsing reminder. 

.

.

What is all this future going to do with me?

 

APPEARANCE

Dark pasts and abnormal hearts

Keep them locked

Gilded secrets chained and barred

You shan’t be mocked,

 

No use shoving them six feet under

No way you can put them to grave

With the flourish of evil

And flair of a demon

They will rise some day,

 

Only way to keep them at bay

Is to weld them shut

In the strongest of diamond cut.

 

The dark pasts too shaming

Abnormal hearts too brittle

Better keep up the appearance

Lest they see you as a cripple,

 

One slip, one slide

And they’ll come at you

With pitchforks and torches alight,

They will crucify you

And nail your spirit down

Your name won’t matter

Nor will your pretty gown,

 

So trust me when I say

Don’t bare your heart naked

Don’t let your faith sway

Only way to keep them at bay

Is to weld them shut

In the strongest of diamond cut.

A FEELING SO FAMILIAR

It’s stirring, a feeling so familiar

I dread it, I welcome it. 

Warring between finding peace

And resisting the waves.

It punishes me yet again

Testing my limits, breaking me raw;

It’s roaring, the demons so familiar

I cower from it, I crave it. 

It’s tar – black and flaming

Rising up my throat. 

I’m a blazing furnace,

Burning through my bone and flesh

I’m a wilting rose,

Thorns sprouting out from my pores;

It’s suffocating, the dark so familiar

I despise it, I embrace it. 

In a cave with an open door

I can see the light

Yet black masks my vision.

I want to move

But ghosts shackle me in.

I want to call out

Alas, shame clogs my cries;

It’s tiring, the helplessness so familiar

I curse it, I bask in it

As I lay in the cave frozen and stiff

I watch the world outside

Marveling at how time flies,

Wondering if there is an end to it

While I wait for my voice to be heard

While I wait for the demons to spur.

KALEIDOSCOPE

The sun hovers in the far left

So close to the rippling water,

Mere inches to a glorious reunion

Time stalls as passion burns brighter,

The world stares in awe

As the two lovers kiss,

Taking pleasure as voyeurs

While the orb drowns in sated bliss,

Look, it’s a miracle

Look, it’s a marvel they say,

Her kaleidoscope disagreed

Mirrored a picture dark and grey,

A dying star splotching the sky

Bloody in its wake,

A treacherous sea swallowing light

Leaving behind heartache, 

She found not marvel but evil, 

Love was just a sinister play. 

 

A LETTER TO YOU

You happened to me like disasters happen to high velocities

Like wars happen to borders, like heartbreak happens to poets

You lurked in the corners, invisible and chronic

So deep in the recess of mind that I finally felt normal

Oh what a fool I’d been, oh what a naïve I’d been

You rose with the next dawn, cape flapping

Roots further plunging, cackle of glee resounding

You whispered dark nothings, wooing me, tempting me

You had me wrapped around your talon, you had me bidding your word

Oh what things I have done, oh what things I have said

You were inevitable, you were going to be my addiction

You made me want, you made me need

My mind said no, my body said no, my heart said no

But you said yes and now you run my fate

Last winter, I blamed the cold for my shaking hands

Spring followed and I blamed the world for your gripping bands. 

This entity of mine can war with you no more

Resist you I can no more

Come summer, I shall blame no one as I perish at your whim

But make no mistake, you will burn along with me

Reduced to dust, never to do the same to anyone

Sweet mercy.

BRAINRANT

What about a reality show where women with wet nails make roti.

What about a dating app for gay men called “meetballs”.

What about a ‘do-minute’ chicken nugget maker.

I’m not allowed to have cupcakes, so I sneak it when my back is turned.

Sometimes, I will click any link coz it says “six-pack in a week”.

My mouth feels crazy,

Maybe I shouldn’t start the day with pizza… 

CANOPY

“I stand under a canopy

Of floating leaves

And a sky so blue

Lost as I am in this world

And within me,

I look to new hope

On the other side of the hill

On the other side of the seas

A yearning in my core

A longing in my soul,

To listen to the color of music

And to see the sound of colour

As twilight blankets the sky,

I whisper a prayer to the stars

That everyday forever

I stand under yet another canopy

Of floating leaves,

On the other side of the hill

On the other side of the seas.”

ILLUSION

“Sun passionately kissed the horizon with the promise of a new dawn,

Subtly taught the heart dwellers the art to move on,

I sat there reminiscing all the sense to heart wars waged,

Watching the twilight hour as the reality around me changed,

I ran into the hallway of illusion away from this madness,

Thought I’ll find my soul out there but was hit by sadness,

The winds led me to believe I would reach the shore,

Yet hope was murdered as desolation began to pour,

Veritable existence drowning under the ocean waves,

I realized regrets are beautiful even while entering the graves.”